


Violet's Contemplation

by VFDBaudelaireFile13



Category: A Series of Unfortunate Events (2004), A Series of Unfortunate Events (TV), A Series of Unfortunate Events - Lemony Snicket
Genre: Angst, Depression, Emotional Baggage, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Gen, Nightmares, Psychological Trauma
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-11
Updated: 2019-07-11
Packaged: 2020-06-26 07:01:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,195
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19762996
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VFDBaudelaireFile13/pseuds/VFDBaudelaireFile13
Summary: It was finally over. Their long, dangerous, nearly fatal nightmare was finally over. Count Olaf was dead. All three Baudelaires could not believe that their nightmare was over.Or so they had thought.





	Violet's Contemplation

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, my dear readers,  
> Please note that there is one section of this story that might trigger some of you, it's a specific depiction of Violet's worst nightmare which, I do not explicitly imply anything, but it takes place during her captivity at the Heimlich Hospital. So if that topic alone makes you queasy, it starts after Klaus begins to tell his sister his nightmare and Violet is heavily debating whether or not to tell hers. The small scene ends when Violet comes back to reality and Klaus is finishing up explaining his nightmare. Please note that again nothing explicit is depicted, I just put this warning because I know there are people who would rather avoid even the tiniest of implications relating to this specific topic. 
> 
> Read with caution. Thank you.

_Sunny!_

**_Sunny!!_ **

**_SUNNY!!!_ **

The two elder Baudelaires orphans watched in horror as the gift caravan that they occupied began rolling down the mountain’s steep, narrow road getting further and further from Count Olaf and their baby sister. The speed of the caravan’s decline threw the two elder Baudelaires harshly to the ground, but not before hitting the eldest Baudelaire in the head, knocking her out cold. As Violet and Klaus fell to the ground, the shirt that they had shared as part of their disguise ripped freeing the two siblings from each other.

Klaus quickly stood up only to discover in horror that his inventive older sister had been knocked unconscious. “Violet!?” he cried, his stomach felt woozy as the caravan took a sharp, wobbly turn avoiding one of the edges of the mountains. He grabbed his older sister by the shoulders shaking her, pleading for her to wake up. _“Violet! Please!”_ To Klaus’ horror, the caravan began to shake along the bumpy, unpaved mountain road.

_"Please, Violet wake up!”_ He felt his eyes begin to water. _“Sunny and I **need** you!”_

Klaus soon realized that more debris from the caravan was beginning to fall all around himself and his unconscious sister. He tried his best to protect her head from any of the items that were falling. Once he was sure everything that could pose a threat to his sister had fallen, he stood up and looked around the small, messy caravan. “What would Violet do?” he asked himself aloud. He began to scream as he peered out of the caravan’s window to discover that he was, unfortunately, out of time. There was barely any road left and Klaus Baudelaire watched in horror as the Caligari Carnival gift caravan containing himself and his sister reached the end of the road and their caravan hoisted itself off the edge of the mountain, as it did Klaus was thrown to the edge of the tilted side of the caravan followed by Violet’s lifeless body. Klaus felt like his short life was flashing before his eyes and his last thought was of Sunny and how she’d spend the rest of her short life in Olaf’s captivity. As the caravan scraped rough edges of the mountain’s landscape, Klaus braced for impact...

Klaus jolted awake as he was thrust back into reality. He was still screaming, although his voice was hoarse. He must have been screaming for a while. “Klaus! Klaus! It’s me, Violet!” his sister called out, he was still screaming as if he was falling to his brutal death.

“Klaus, _please._ Calm down... _I am right here._ Everything is fine. _He can’t get to us anymore,”_ Violet reassured her brother soothingly. Klaus began looking around the room.

“Was it _the_ nightmare?” she asked as He started to slowly calm down, all he could do was shake his head in response because his throat was sore from screaming and he was trying to catch his breath.

The nightmare that the eldest Baudelaire was referring to was a reoccurring nightmare that her younger brother seemed to have. It was set back at the Lucky Smells Lumbermill and it involved Dr. Georgina Orwell and Count Olaf hypnotizing Klaus and forcing him to murder both his sisters in the most brutal and cruelest ways imaginable. The way Klaus would perform these terrible murders _always_ changed, which was one of the reasons Klaus hated this nightmare the most, he never knew what to expect and that aspect alone was his least favorite. Sometimes he’d wake up, other times, it went on for way too long and the nightmare would continue with him being stuck in Olaf’s captivity until he turned of age and then the nightmare would depict how Olaf would murder him after getting ahold of the Baudelaire fortune.

He peered up at Violet who had a concerned and tired look on her face. Klaus realized at once that Violet had awoken him from yet another nightmare. He slowly sat up, noticing that he was in a cold sweat and looked around the dimly lit room that he and his sisters had designated as their living room.

“Did I wake Bea or Sunny?”

“No, just me,” Violet replied still wearing that concerned look on her face.

“Sorry about that,”

“No...no...you don’t need to be sorry. It’s fine” she sighed, “You actually interrupted one of _my_ nightmares,”

The two siblings shared a small smile. It made both of them have conflicting emotions, on one hand, they were relieved that they had someone who understood the Hell they were going through with these vivid and realistic nightmares. But, on the other hand, they hated knowing that their siblings were also being tormented by these demented nightmares.

After a long silence, Violet spoke, “Do you...wanna talk about it?”

“I’ll tell you mine, if you tell me yours,” Klaus replied.

All Violet could do was nod her head. In all honesty, Violet did love being able to talk to Klaus and even Sunny about her mental issues when it pertained to these reoccurring nightmares but Violet did not want to share any details of _this_ specific one. Not even with her younger brother, who compared to Sunny, would be able to talk with his sister about this subject matter; but she felt she shouldn’t.

As Klaus rambled on about his nightmare concerning the two of them falling off a mountain in the gift caravan. Violet contemplated explaining her dream. Although, Klaus had awakened her before anything obscene or vile could happen to her dream counterpart it was the sheer fact that her dream seemed to be eerily similar to her haunting experience at the Heimlich Hospital. Although in her own nightmare, she was enduring an out of body experience and could see her drugged unconscious body laying lifeless on a gurney. She could also see Olaf in his ridiculous Dr. Mattathias Medical-School disguise; he was alone in the room with her. There was no Esme. There was no other member of his horrid troupe. Just him. Weirdly enough, all he would do is circle her lifeless body like a shark, as if she was stuck in the middle of shark-infested waters. Back when this had actually happened to her, she was nearly 100% certain that nothing obscenely vile happened to her while under the effects of the anesthesia because when she awoke she didn’t feel different. But unfortunately, a small part of her had some doubts. Her subconscious must have realized that she had a smidge of doubt and uses that to torment her in her sleep. She was luckier than her brother in one aspect, when _that_ specific nightmare is haunting her, her body jolts her awake just as Olaf tries anything. She doesn’t know if one day, her nightmare will go further than it has ever gotten before, and she never wanted to find out.

Klaus began to finish explaining his nightmare to which Violet was doing her best to pay attention while contemplating if her articulate younger brother could handle the details of her worst nightmare. As he finished, she decided that it was better to keep this demon to herself. She was the eldest, she was the one who had to be the sponge for their problems, not vice versa. So she decided to share a nightmare that Sunny had shared with her a couple of days ago, about their dark fall in the elevator shaft of 667 Dark Avenue. Violet felt bad for lying to Klaus, but she thought that had she told him nothing at all, it would create distrust and she couldn’t risk that. So as she remembered each grim detail that Sunny had shared with her, she watched Klaus’ face begin to darken. Sunny’s nightmare was nearly as twisted as her siblings’ but simple. It was pitch black but Sunny could see her siblings’ terrified faces and hear their terrified screams for help, but unlike when this actually happened to them, there was no net to catch them and they were falling for a much longer time until eventually, they would hit the bottom of the elevator shaft with a loud **_SMACK!_ **and Sunny assumed this meant they died, she had been woken up by Violet right at this part.

When Violet got done telling Klaus about “her” dream, she stood up to go back to where she had set up a small make-shift bed for herself. She was able to construct both a crib for Beatrice and a small bed for Sunny in her free time but she hadn’t been able to build herself or Klaus a bed. Raising a baby and a toddler was harder work than Violet had ever imagined, she had no idea how her mother was able to handle Violet as a toddler and Klaus as a baby. Everyday Violet would tell herself that tomorrow she’d get to work on Klaus’ bed but she rarely ever had the time. Klaus and Sunny were very helpful with baby Beatrice but as the eldest, Violet was in charge of all of them. She was in charge of herself, her siblings, and her adoptive daughter. That’s why she always gave Klaus the couch in the living room while she would simply sleep on a pile of blankets with a single pillow. She always put them before herself. That’s what the eldest child does.

Before she could turn to leave she felt Klaus grab her hand. “Could you...” Klaus began, a little embarrassed. He was a thirteen-year-old boy who was about to ask his sister if she could stay with him until he fell back asleep. Violet gave him a small smile. “Yes, I will stay here with you until you fall back asleep,” she sat down on the floor in front of the couch and placed a hand in his.

Violet sat there in silence for a couple of minutes, allowing her thoughts to unwind. Every so often she would look behind her at her brother just to make sure he wasn’t having another nightmare. God, how she hated that her siblings were plagued with these viciously vivid nightmares. She wished she was the only one being affected by the cruel after facts of what the three had gone through. But alas, cruel reality has once again sunk its teeth into the children because these nightmares were occurring much more often for Violet’s liking. She felt a few small but heavy tears run down her cheeks. Had it been just last night where she was woken up by her toddler sister, who crawled her way into Violet’s make-shift bed trying to get as close to her elder sister as physically possible. Violet, who would lift up one of her arms so she could hold Sunny would just rub Sunny’s head and hum and old song that the Baudelaire parents had sung to the two elder Baudelaire children when they were around Sunny’s age. Before her crying could get loud enough to wake Klaus, she turned around and made sure his breathing was calm and his body no longer shook, all she could hear was his quiet snores. She stood up ever so carefully as to not disturb her sleeping brother.

Before making her way outside, she quietly checked on both Sunny and Beatrice. She then maneuvered Beatrice’s crib to the living room that way if she wakes up while Violet is gone, then Klaus could hear her. Violet walked silently around the coastal shelf until she reached where she and Klaus’ buried Kit Snicket’s and Count Olaf’s bodies. Violet was crying the entirety of her walk, she didn’t know why. She felt like the dam that she had built in her inner core had been broken somehow because she couldn’t stop crying. She’d been crying since she was sitting on the floor waiting for her younger brother to fall back asleep.

She began to stare long and hard at the graves switching from staring at Kit’s to staring at Olaf’s, as she stared at the graves, she began to slowly break down. She fell to her knees and began to mourn. She was not mourning the death of her enemy, she couldn’t care less whether or not he was dead. She mourned for her lost friends, three noble triplets she highly doubted she’d ever see again. Violet mourned for the lost lives of her past guardians, for ineffectual but noble volunteers who lost their lives. She mourned for her parents, whose deaths started this series of unfortunate events that she and her siblings had endured.

But most of all, Violet mourned for their lost childhood. Their lost innocence. She looked at the ocean and silently thought of Klaus, how all of this was going to affect him over time and thinking of how it was already affecting him. He has become more pessimistic these days...he smiled less, laughed hardly ever. He was too serious and neurotic for someone his age...an obvious after-effect of what he’d gone through.

She began sobbing more when she thought of little Sunny. She hoped and prayed that time would heal her younger sister’s wounds entirely. She’d forget most of the treachery she had endured at such a young age and actually get to have a childhood as Klaus and Violet had before the tragic death of their parents. This all started when Sunny was just an infant. _It wasn’t fair to Sunny!_ Violet thought as she wiped the tears from her eyes. She and Klaus had more than a decade of love, happiness, and comfort with their parents, Sunny barely even got a year. Violet thought of how this would affect her growing up, she’d now be raised by her fifteen-year-old sister and thirteen-year-old brother.

Violet slowly sat down in the sand in front of the graves as she finally thought about _herself._ Her lost innocence. She had to grow up so fast at only fourteen. She had to be a surrogate mother to her siblings, she did not know if her life would ever be normal again. She doubted it. Slowly, her mind wandered to the thought of Beatrice II, Kit’s orphaned daughter. She was now an adoptive mother to this infant, she was a guardian. Violet had no idea how to be a guardian. She scarcely had anyone to learn from. The only decent guardian she and her siblings had was their Uncle Monty and he died shortly after their arrival at his house.

Violet paused as her thoughts went back to Olaf. Everything he put them through. She slowly turned to his grave and stared long and hard at it, with a death glare so mean it would have killed him instantly if he were still alive. Violet had never imagined her enemy’s demise would be so bittersweet. But that was her sad reality, it was her bleak existence. His death did not necessarily mean their troubles were over, although he was the root of a lot of the Baudelaire siblings’ troubles.

“This... _this is all your fault!!!_ If it weren’t for you!...” Her voice broke. The words too heavy on her heart to continue the sentence. She began to sob harder. “You are where you belong now. You will **_BURN_** just like you made my parents and house burn!”

She meant every word. She allowed the venomous words to spill right out of her mouth. She didn’t care anymore. She knew the truth. Her siblings knew the truth. Deep down on the inside, they knew just how their series of unfortunate events began.

Violet turned to the calm ocean trying to catch her breath, trying to calm down. She began to realize that Olaf’s death had marked the start to a few new problems that were plaguing the Baudelaires. Problems she would now have to face whether she liked it or not. His death, along with the tragic death of Kit Snicket meant the Baudelaires were alone, _all alone._

The **_one_** constant in their lives after the death of their parents was now gone. _Gone forever._ Violet couldn’t help but feel a weird sense of emptiness within her heart. She was also torn on whether or not his death meant **_all_** of their family’s secrets died with him.

_Oh, stop kidding yourself Violet, like he was ever gonna tell us what we wanted to know._ She thought to herself.

He wouldn’t even admit to the fact that he orphaned them in the first place. He deliberately sidetracked Klaus’ initial statement when the middle Baudelaire finally spoke aloud a secret all three of them held in their hearts.

Before his death, Violet had asked Olaf to do one good thing in his life, to where he responded that he has done plenty of good things in his life. The example he decided to use was that he once adopted three orphans. This is where Klaus could no longer hold his tongue and spilled the dark theory that the three siblings had held for a while.

_“You’re the one who made us orphans in the first place!”_ Klaus had yelled at the dying man.

_“Is that what you think?”_ Olaf had replied completely dodging the accusation even after Violet, herself, had replied with _“We know it,”._

_Was that sick bastard trying to pin their parent’s deaths on...their parents? As to say, it was their mistakes that led to their deaths... That cryptic bastard couldn’t just give us a for sure answer? Nope. Even on his death bed, he was giving my siblings and me two middle fingers in the air, his final “fuck you” to us._

The Baudelaires each whole-heartedly believe that Olaf murdered their parents. They’ve had this suspicion close to the very start to their unfortunate plight and in the children's’ eyes, the evidence just kept on piling up giving them very faint doubt that Olaf either had a hand or a say in the deaths of their beloved parents. She slowly sank to her knees again, her eyes pouring out tears. As she fell to the ground, she let out a frustrated and tired scream into the air.

She turned to Kit’s grave, “Kit... _why_ did you leave us... _we need you_. _I can’t do this! I don’t know how to do this, dammit!_ I don’t know what to do, Kit!”

Violet could not fail now. She was the eldest. She had to keep her promise to her parents and now she had to keep her promise to Kit Snicket. She and her siblings promised Kit that her daughter would _never_ be alone. She was going to keep these promises. She was going to raise her sister and her adoptive daughter with the help of Klaus, although she was going to do her best to provide him a normative childhood, or what little of his childhood remains.

Violet just wanted the nightmares for her siblings and herself to end, she did not want to feel all alone in this world. She wanted to have her life back the way it had been when she was thirteen...but deep down she knew that this was not how the story goes.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so so much. I really enjoy writing and hope to keep this going. Please comment and give me either positive or negative feedback, I am a fan of both constructive criticism and appraisal. Every comment helps me improve. 
> 
> -Sue.


End file.
